All direct quotes from Bruce Di Marsico in bold.
Unspecified pronouns such as “it” and ‘that” are model words for an event. In practice, substitute a summary of the client’s actual description of the event, using their own language.
General emotional words such as unhappy, feeling bad, feeling good, sad, etc. are model words for the client’s specific emotional feelings. In practice, substitute a summary of the client’s actual description of their feelings, using their own language.
Questions to clarify ambiguous language
“What do you mean by that?”
Questions to initiate a session (“First Question”)
“What are you unhappy about?”
“How can I help you?”
“What are you feeling bad about?”
“Why are you feeling bad?”
“Well, what’s bugging you?”
“Well, what’s bothering you?”
“Well, what is there that you’re feeling bad about?”
“Why are you sad?”
Questions to clarify specifically what the client is unhappy about (“Second Question”)
“What about that makes you unhappy?”
“Well, what is there about that that you’re unhappy about?”
Questions to explore reasons for unhappiness (“Third Question”)
“Why are you unhappy about that?”
“Well, for what reason does that bother you?”
“What is there about that?”
“For what reason? Why are you unhappy?”
“For what reason does that bother you?”
“Why does that bother you?”
“Well, why would you be unhappy if that happened?”
Variants of third question in response to “I don’t know”
“Why do you believe you’d have to be unhappy?”
“Why do you believe that that is something to be unhappy about?”
Questions to explore the causes of the unhappiness (“Fourth Question”)
“What are you afraid it would mean, if you weren’t unhappy about that?”
“What are you afraid would happen, if you weren’t unhappy about that?”
“What are you afraid would happen if you stopped feeling bad about that?”
“What are you afraid would happen if that was okay?”
“What would be the disadvantage to you of thinking it’s okay?”
“What would be the threat to you to think it’s okay?”
Variants of fourth question when the presumed cause is other people’s behavior
“Why are other people not allowed to do what they have to do?”
“Why aren’t people allowed to be unhappy if they have to be?”
“Would anyone have to be unhappy with you?”
Exploring releasing unhappiness (“Fifth Question”)
“Why do you believe that?”
“Why do you believe that if you didn’t need it anymore you wouldn’t want it?”
“Why do you believe that if you weren’t unhappy with the way it was, it would mean that you didn’t want it different with all your heart?”
“Why would you believe that you wouldn’t want what you wanted, when you no longer feared not having it?”
Questions to test whether the client has truly released unhappiness:
“So you would really be OK with that happening?”
“You would really feel good if such-and-such a thing happened?”