Outline
- Our desires are the best for ourselves.
- It is impossible to be mistaken about what is best for us.
- Accepting someone’s advice is when our knowing what’s best for us coincides with what someone thinks is best for us.
- When we are trusting ourselves, our decisions on behalf of others will be best for them.
Introduction
In this writing, Bruce Di Marsico discusses perfect self-trust.
Perfect self-trust is knowing our desires are the best for ourselves. Bruce Di Marsico shows that our desires can only be what is best for ourselves; if we are believing that our desires are not best for ourselves, that can only be because we are aware of desires that are better for ourselves, which are also our desires, and what we want more. Therefore, it is impossible to be mistaken about what is best for us.
Accepting someone’s advice is when our knowing what’s best for us coincides with what someone thinks is best for us. If two people coincide in point-of-view, they do not have the “same” point-of-view. Rather, in a moment, for all practical purposes, two individual’s point-of-view is relatively coincident. Our point-of-view is always ours, and never someone else’s.
When we are trusting ourselves, our decisions on behalf of others will be best for them.
Perfect Self-Trust
We believe that we should be feeling good and being happy regardless of what we think and do. We believe that first we should feel good for no reason and then think and do what we would love to think and do.
Isn’t the truth better?
Being happy and feeling good comes from the “way” we think. The “way” we think means how we think of what we think. If we judge our thoughts and desires as not the best way to think and want we have believed that the “best” way (meaning, what is most productive and useful for me) is not our way – this is the equivalent of believing that I am not the best me for me to start with. I need another me. I need to be changed, a miracle, a transformation, a death and resurrection. I need a new me.
What we feel and feel like doing come from what we believe (think). This is truth. There is no other way. If we think (believe) there may be another truth then we will feel accordingly. We will feel dissatisfied with the above statement. See! What we think produces the appropriate feeling.
The only truth regarding happiness — true, real, felt happiness – is this: you are the best for you. Your decisions are the best. Your desires are the best. What you think is the best way of thinking for you. You, as you are, is the best you for others. There is nothing about you that is not the best for you getting what you want. You are the best you for having what you want. What you forget is best forgotten. When you remember, it is the best time for you to remember. What you like to eat, when you want to sleep, what you love to have, who you want to have love you, etc., is the best thing for you. When or if you change your mind, then that will be the best time to change your mind and that is the best change for you.
You know what is best for you. You absolutely know it. You cannot be wrong. It is impossible that you can be mistaken.
If another suggests something to you about what to think or what to want or how to do, because you know what is best for you, you will know, absolutely know, whether they are right or not. You know when you recognize what you want in their suggestion.
If they are right about what you want, if you now realize something you hadn’t realized, it is not because you do not know what is best for you, it is precisely because you do know that what you want is best for you.
If you didn’t become aware until another made you aware it is because you know it was the best time to be aware. If another tells you a truth that you recognize and you realize that you have not been aware before that is because you know what is best for you. If it were better for you to have known sooner you would have made yourself aware sooner.
You are the best way of being yourself and being happy.
It only seems like we weren’t because we believed otherwise.
Isn’t it perfect that if we believe that we are bad for ourselves, we should feel bad, unsure, untrusting, crazy?
We believed that if we were good for ourselves we would always be happy and sure and confident and doing what pleased us.
No. That is wrong. Impossible. If that were true we would be lost. We would be truly hopeless, not only feeling hopeless. It is enough that that attitude makes us feel hopeless. If it were true we would also know we were hopeless and instantly die.
Because we begin with “if” we are still indicating our belief that we may not be best for ourselves. Change “if” to “since”: Since I am best for me and you are best for you. . . If I believe you are also best for me that is because since I am best for me I can decide that you are too. I cannot be wrong. It cannot be that I believe you are best for me because I believe I am not best for me, but only because I am – If I were to believe that you are best because I am not, then I will doubt even that decision and not really believe you are best for me. You are not best for me because only you believe you are best for me or because you are best for me by some outside magic, but because, since I am best for me, I can think or know that you are also all I want for me. It is not because I lack anything for my fullness that I love you, but simply because I am sure of my desires and decisions as best for me. When you are sure of you, your decisions for me are as good as mine. When I am sure of me, my decisions are as good for you as yours.
I cannot be bad for you anymore that I can be bad for myself.
What I think about me makes all the difference. Shouldn’t it?
Should I feel honest when I think I may not be?
Should I feel happy when I think I may not be?
Should I feel happy when I think that I ought to be happy before I deserve to enjoy myself?
If I believe that doing or thinking what I would most love to think or do must wait until I’m happy, how will I become happy?
Happiness does not come from that kind of thinking or from doing that kind of thinking.
Happiness comes from thinking and acting, happily. Not acting like a happy person or trying to think like a happy person, but from being happy and believing and behaving happily.
It means be happy about how you think and what you want. Be happy to do what you want and do it the way you would most love to.
Let yourself happen. You’re best. The way you’ll happen is happy and beautiful and true.
Happiness is! Happiness lives in you. It directs every beat of your heart, every thought, every desire, every movement in your body. Everything. Absolutely everything.
Perfection is moving you. You are now perfect.
Questions for Reflection
Are there desires that you have that you are suspicious of?
How do you know to be suspicious of these desires?
What is the desire behind your suspicion of these desires?
If you believe that your desire might be “bad for you”, what is the desire behind that question? Do you want to better understand the consequences? Do you want to contextualize the desire within its greater purpose?
Are there any reasons why you find yourself untrustworthy to yourself?
If so, on what basis do you trust your evaluation of yourself as untrustworthy?
Meditation for the Week
If you are questioning your desires, that is only because you are becoming aware of a greater desire, such as the desire to wait for more information.